SPOILER WARNING: This entire post contains heavy spoilers for Baldur’s Gate 3, and in particular The Dark Urge origin! Proceed to read at your own peril!

Written in the Year of Three Ships Sailing, 1492 DR, the following are extracts from the Chronicles of Dawnmaster Aeneas, a Bhaalspawn who was at the center of the events of the Mindflayer invasion. Together with a group of similarly lost souls, he was instrumental in the defeat of the Elder Brain that threatened to destroy Baldur’s Gate and most of the Sword Coast. Having woken up without recollection of who he was, he turned to Lathander to guide him. During this time, he overcame his dark urges and rid himself of his father’s heritage.

The Day I Vowed to be Reborn

“When I woke up on this strange ship, my mind was empty. All that I could think was, ‘Where am I? What’s going on?’ and I had such a headache, like a thousand needlepricks in my rotten skull. It was bizarre, I knew my name, my age and my hometown down to the smallest little alleyway. But I had no memory of my life, my past, or any people in my life. Did I have a family? Parents? Siblings?

As I tried to remember, all I could see was a veil of red. Darkest red, as if the world was drenched in blood. Vague and blurry flashes came into my mind, of a path of corpses, a castle of bones… it scared my wits out of me. I heard myself utter the vilest and most violent things, but I had no sense of why I would say these things.

There, at that moment, I knew I had to do everything in my power to resist these dark urges. I offered a prayer to the gods.

“Lathander to light,
Selûne to guide,
Kelemvor to judge,
And passage provide.”

I sat and prayed, and I asked for a new chance, a new beginning, a new life.

I swore an oath to fight on the side of light in the struggle against this darkness inside me. I swore to preserve the sanctity of life and the beauty of nature. Even though I had no clear memory of the atrocities of my past, I asked for forgiveness for whatever atrocities my former self committed, and should I ever fail to resist my urges, I asked to be judged appropriately.

I asked to be reborn, to kindle the light of hope in the world, to beat back the despair. I swore to stand against the wickedness in the world that seeks to swallow all the good, beauty, love and laughter in the world. I would stand against any force that would render barren that where life flourishes.

I knew then and there, that if I would ever allow the light to die in my own heart, I would not be able to preserve it in the world. I vowed to delight in song and music, in love and laughter, and in beauty and art. I vowed to be the light, a glorious beacon for all who live in despair, and to shine where all lights have gone out.

There, being reborn from this vile, fleshy womb on the reeking floors of the Nautiloid, I felt that Lathander heard my prayer. I felt my own promise, my oaths and vows, flowing through me and becoming divine with the power of the dawn.”

[The Chronicles continue over many pages, detailing the escape from the burning Nautiloid and seeking companionship with a number of similarly afflicted escaped prisoners.]

The Morning After the Urge Took Over

“Many days have passed since I awoke on the Nautiloid, with never a dull moment. I swore an oath to protect and preserve life, yet there is a part of me that longs to end it in the most gruesome and gory manner. Blood follows me everywhere. I fantasized about hacking off a hand that was merely asking to be rescued. I almost brutalized an innocent squirrel. In my mind I saw myself tearing the wings off a wounded bird, and was barely able to stop my body from following through. I wonder, how many die today? How many die tomorrow?

With my mind never quiet, I still repressed these vile urges. But then I met the bard. A beautiful, innocent woman with a dormant talent for music. She sought out our camp later that day and asked to join our fellowship. We played together, and reveled in the beauty of music.

But as I was asleep, whatever lies dormant within me took over. I woke up in horror, as I saw the lifeless corpse of the bard in front of me, a sigil painted on the ground, and her blood on my hands, still warm. I could not believe this sight, I was overcome with terror and disgust. But a part of me felt exhilarated at this beautiful death. Did I do this? Have I been this way before?

I almost lost my faith. How could I do this?  But despite this trial of sanity, I still felt Lathander’s divinity coursing through my veins with the promise that I made. He still has faith in me. I’m still in control. Just.”

The Day the Butler Came

“It’s only been a day since the bard met her untimely demise at my bloodied hands. I’m still alive… so that’s progress. But once again my rest was denied. During the night, the most vile creature appeared to me and commended me for my horrible deed of the previous night. He called me master and gifted me an artifact, praising what I did.

Needless to say, I was appalled and horrified. Who am I, really? Why did he speak to me like this? I cannot comprehend what all of this implies. I have such a headache. But I’m determined. I can do better, I must. I will not let the urge take over again.

Wretched thing, pull yourself together!”

[The Chronicles explain in minute details the events of the following days, involving a great many goblins, tieflings and druids.]

The Day I Found the Artifact in Ruins of the Monastery

“What path lies before me? I have often asked myself this question since I swore an Oath to Lathander. Today he answered my prayers and equipped me with the most divine of gifts. I now wield the power of the morning sun in my hands. With it, I shall forever defeat this darkness, in these shadow-cursed lands and within my soul.”

[The Chronicles continue detailing a long journey through a cursed land, a particularly tough struggle to resist the urge to quench out the light of Selûne, and the eventual arrival in the streets of Baldur’s Gate, where a great many evils were encountered.]

The Day I Met my Nemesis

“I shouldn’t have wished to live in more interesting times, for today I learned my true nature at the hands of the vilest creation of the gods, who named me her ‘blood-starved sibling’. One day I’ll catch a break. It was her who mangled my skull for her own gain, and made me forget who I am. As insidious as she is, I would have to thank her for setting me free from the unspeakable being I used to be.

My companions were surprisingly compassionate, and for some, I am not the first Bhaalspawn they met. They believe in me, and they believe I can burn away my own darkness with my own inner light. And I will. Father, are you watching me? I will renounce your blood.”

The Day I was Reborn

“Worship me, the prophet of the end! For today, I was reborn! I have vanquished my urge! But as all things go in life, something important is never easy. To be reborn, one must first die.

This day, I stood against my vile sister. With Lathander’s light on my side, I smote her into ashes. I renounced my father. The Lord of Murder, he did what he does best and killed me. Dying is easy. Nothing hurts anymore.

I felt the blood of Bhaal depart from me, a beautiful death, as I was reborn at the hands of the withered keeper of records, who named me Challenger of the Gods.

I have been given what is denied to many. A new life, free from the abominable urges that haunted me. I intend to use it to the fullest, and fulfill the oaths I took when all of this began. Still breathing. Despite everything.”

[The chronicles continue to tell notable events of Dawnmaster Aeneas’ life. After the Elder Brain was defeated, he writes about how he split his time between rebuilding Rosymorn Monastery and establishing a new order of worship for Lathander, nurturing his creative and musical side in the wizard’s tower in Waterdeep, and occasional journeys to Avernus to help the friends he made on his unlikely journey to rid the hells of evil.]